By Bart Carey, J.D., Cathleen Collinsworth, CDFA®, MAFF®, and Carol Hughes, Ph.D., LMFT
It’s the final meeting in your client’s Collaborative Divorce process. You are looking around the table and see that each client and professional appears ready to proceed. You have thoroughly prepared your client to be able to reach agreement with his spouse. Alas! Within the first half hour of this final meeting you realize that both your client and the other client are tenaciously clinging to their positions! You ask yourself how this could happen?
It’s important for everyone to become Agreement Ready.
Even experienced collaborative divorce practitioners often fail to understand how all professionals on an interdisciplinary team can assist clients, even high-conflict clients, to become Agreement Ready. At CP Cal’s Celebration XIV on Sunday, on April 28, 2019, in San Diego, trainers Bart Carey, Cathleen Collinsworth and … Read More
The anger and other emotions that are usually a part of divorce make it pretty hard to be respectful—Can the Collaborative Divorce Process enable the parties to find some level of respect for each other?
There are many metaphors people use to describe going through a divorce–one is the “leaver” and the other is the “leavee;” one is the windshield and the other is the bug; one is the bat and the other is the ball. There’s a lot of high emotion that’s flowing throughout a divorce; having the coaches in place really allows clients to deal with they must deal with in a constructive and productive manner. In stark contrast is the court system, where the clients must be ready to plow through on the court’s time schedule making decisions that they may not yet be in a good emotional place to be making.
(1) First, the Collaborative Divorce … Read More
Divorce raises so many questions.
Divorce is hard, and it is one of the most painful times in anyone’s life. Fear about the future will tend to put your dreams and plans on hold. That fear though can be reduced if you take control of your divorce by learning more about your divorce options. A Divorce Options Workshop is one of the best ways to begin learning what you don’t know about divorce and to help you decide what options might work best for you.
What You Can Learn in the Divorce Options Workshop
The Divorce Options Workshop gives you details of four different ways to go about getting your divorce.
Litigation (going to court).
This is the method that most people know about for handling a divorce. One spouse files a petition with the court seeking a divorce. Both spouses have a lawyer for themselves. Your lawyer represents … Read More
The Problem and the Solution
Mixed Results for Divorce Options Attendance
Divorce Options (DO) workshops were developed by the Sacramento Collaborative group in association with CP Cal about 10 years ago. The original intent was to position the Collaborative Divorce process as one of four primary divorce options- competitive with litigation, mediation and do-it-yourself divorce. DO workshop presenters have consistently commented that they feel that three hours with a seasoned attorney, mental health and financial professional for little or no cost is a real bargain. Folks should be crowding in line to attend our DO workshops. Indeed, our workshops should be packed full each month.
But DO workshop attendance for many groups in California has been less than desired. Presenter participation has dwindled over time. Some groups are considering consolidating their DO efforts or presenting quarterly instead of monthly. Some are even discontinuing their workshops entirely.
Two practice groups … Read More